Een gebed in mijn hart

The page is blank I feel empty. The words in my heart are many but none seem to come forth. I feel as if the waves are washing over me, but I am still standing, left with nothing but a drenched soul. Jesus, I need the wave to be YOU, I need YOU to drench me, to quench my thirst, to satisfy my hunger. Jesus YOU and YOU alone. As I stand my feet on the ground, it feels as the ground beneath me is about to shake and I am not sure if what I need to do is run or stand firm and let NOTHING shake me.

My feet are ready to stand firm in YOUR word, YOUR truth and still I feel like I am bear, there seems to be nothing to hold to, no shoes that fit my feet to stay on the ground. Lord, YOUR truth will keep me standing, YOUR wave of mercy will wash me clean, YOUR strong hand will hold me from falling over in the midst of the world that is coming at me so fast. The world with its worries, the do’s and the don’ts, the what is right and what isn’t. Only YOU are RIGHT, only holding on to YOU is what needs to be done.

In my day today I need YOU, hold on to YOU, nothing but YOU. You are my strength in my weakness, YOU are my source of hope, my source of energy, my source of reality. Jesus YOU are real, there has never been anybody like YOU. There is power in YOUR life, there is power in YOUR death, there is even more power in YOUR resurrection. I need YOUR life to ignite my heart, my soul, my body, my inner being. Without YOU I feel lost, without YOU there is no purpose. Without YOU I do it all wrong, I go the wrong way, I make the wrong choices. JESUS YOU came so you can understand me, my hears cry, my desire, my hopes and dreams, where I am at today. I come to YOU, my KING, my GOD, my SAVIOUR, my DESIRE.

In your life I want to live, through your life I want to walk, through YOU, only YOU. Be the fire in my heart, be the fullness in my soul, be the treasure in my chest, be the source of energy, be the moonlight in my darkness, be the sunshine in my day, be the fragrance of my surroundings, be the wind in my face. Be my ALL, BE MY ALL, BE MY ALL RIGHT NOW, this very hour, be my all, hold me Lord, cause I feel like falling, restore me Lord for I am failing, teach me Lord for I made mistakes, forgive me Lord for not allowing YOU to guide me when I needed it the most.

Clear my wrong doing, make it whiter than snow, make it disappear so that tomorrow will be new, will be fresh. May I know that You took me, my hand and my heart and as I laid it on the alter it was washed clean, mended and restored so that when I speak, when I share, it will only be what YOU have done, what YOU gave me, ONLY YOU. Never will there be anybody that can do what YOU did, so I come to YOU to give to ME what nobody else can give me. I don’t have to say it with words, because YOU already know. YOU know me so well, I am YOUR child, I am YOUR servant, I belong to YOU. I need to belong to YOU, my heart needs the covering, my soul needs to fulfilling, my whole self needs to be held by none other than YOU, JESUS!!

I am calling onto YOU, I need of YOU, come to me, hear my call, I need to hear YOU speak, like a daughter hears her father. The longing of my heart is to understand YOUR heart, may I come to you in all reverence and sincerity as I step before YOUR throne, I stand in awe of YOUR glory, of YOUR strength and I ask of YOU, Father give me today what I needed yesterday, give me today what my heart needs the most, give me today what I missed, give me now the peace that will surpass all understanding so that what I don’t understand will become clear as the light of day. YOU are ever holy, ever glorious, ever majestic, ever sincere, forever near me, for me and before me. JESUS your name is wonderful, amazingly great and never ending, forever I will praise YOU, forever I will call on YOU to fill me and renew for I call to you Jesus!!